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THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, May 30th 2007
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Good Morning Groanies,

I know I'm supposed to share more stories from my vacation,
but something happened over the weekend that I need to
share.

It was Sunday afternoon and Stacy and I decided to head out
and see "Shrek the Third". The movie wasn't the greatest,
but that isn't the focus of today's story.

We made sure that we had a filling lunch before we made
our way to the cinema in hopes to avoid any additional
purchases. (I have a soft spot for nachos... it's near my
belly button)

Anywho, as we sat and playfully chatted winding the time
down to the start of the picture we noticed another patron
of the arts who was accompanied by her two grandchildren.

We thought that it was sweet that grandma was treating her
two angels to a summer feature and more popcorn, nachos,
candy and soda than you could shake a stick at.

The kids took their seats and grandma made sure they were
behaving. As she began to sit the gigantic container of
nachos started to move and suddenly the room and all that
we in it moved in slow-motion.

The nachos, cheese and all, fell on the couple that sat in
the row ahead of the grandma and her two little ones. Stacy
turned and looked at one another and said, "This is gonna
get ugly." But it didn't. The grandma was extremely
apologetic and the couple did miss the shower of cheese,
but it was exciting none the less.

I love going to the movies.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

mailto:groaner@gophercentral.com
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It was the final examination for an introductory Biology
course at the local university. Like many such freshman
courses, it was designed to weed out new students, having
over 500 students in the class!

The examination was two hours long, and exam booklets were
provided. The professor was very strict and told the class
that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours
would not be accepted and the student would fail. Half of
an hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked
the professor for an exam booklet.

"You're not going to have time to finish this," the
professor stated sarcastically as he handed the student
a booklet.

"Yes I will," replied the student. He then took a seat and
began writing. After two hours, the professor called for
the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in.
All except the late student, who continued writing. An hour
later, the last student came up to the professor who was
sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He
attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets
already there.

"No you don't, I'm not going to accept that. It's late."

The student looked incredulous and angry.

"Do you know who I am?"

"No, as a matter of fact I don't," replied the professor
with an air of sarcasm in his voice.

"Do you know who I am?" the student asked again in a louder
voice.

"No, and I don't care." replied the professor with an air
of superiority.

"Good," replied the student, who quickly lifted the stack
of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and walked
out of the room.

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A: Far from poopin!

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